Monday, June 07, 2004

BJJ Barbie and Kollel Ken

EL SEGUNDO, CALIFORNIA - [] In an effort to prop up lagging sales for their Barbie doll and Ken doll line, Mattel has targeted the little Jewish girl market with Barbie dolls that reflect Jewish culture.

Kollel Barbie comes with several jobs as her accessories and a tummy that inflates and deflates in nine month cycles. Kollel Ken comes with a bench to sit on and a table to put his gemara on. Ken's head fits perfectly into the contours of the gemorah accessory and is equipped to drool and snore away the day while Barbie tends to the babies and her 17 jobs.

Hasidic Barbie comes with permanent stockings and is bald, but you'll never know because it's covered with a state-of-the-art shpitzel and pillbox hat. Hasidic Ken comes with downward-looking eyes because he's not allowed to look at other dolls.

Yeshivish Barbie comes with 84 snoods, 174 hats, 24 non-Indian hair sheitels and one tichel that allows her hair to show a bit when she's feeling naughty. Yeshivish Ken comes with one suit, one crumpled hat, and one pair of tzitzis that drag on the ground.

Modern Barbie comes with pants, plus a helmet and body armor to protect her from the stones thrown at her by ultra-orthodox Ken dolls that come with the Meah Shearim playset.

Upper West Side Barbie comes with 74 single Ken dolls she considers friends because she doesn't think of them "that way." Little does she know that 37 of the Ken dolls have like this totally huge crush on her. She also comes with Kleenexes to wipe away the tears that she sheds every time Skipper reminds her that "Friends" is over.

These new dolls, with their controversial accessories, did not go uncontested. Several organizations, including the Anti Defamation Kollel League, the Anti Defamation Hasidic League, the Anti Defamation Yeshivish League, the Anti Defamation Modern League and the Anti Defamation Upper West Side League have voiced concern over the stereotypes these dolls represent.

In a press release, Mattel said, "Tough noogies, just WAIT till we come out with Nidah Barbie, we KNOW that's gonna push some buttons!"